Worry About Yourself, Tonight!!

If you know me (us) you will know we have a child who was diagnosed with ADHD.  You can read more about our walk, in these other blog postings:

One very full testimony! One of the biggest in my life!

 A mother of a child with ADHD

 In the first one I posted listed above I told how she was healed!!!  We have our days, but I will not say she has ADHD.  This week has been such a hard week.. I have had it up to here with your behavior, as I have said a lot this week.. But... tonight as I thought I would come to the internet to find fix my child ideas.. God slapped me in the face.. My child is healed.. it is ME.... 

But...... I have to repeat myself everyday with the same things that come out of my mouth... No, you can not ride around the block on your bike. No, you can not eat before bed. No, you can not watch that.  NO, NO, NO.... Clean your room, put up your clothes, pick up your shoes.. DON'T TRY TO RE-ORGANIZE, JUST PICK IT UP... Every day she comes running in ready to go to the hospital with some injury that most would just jump back up and run with. So my nerves have been stretched.

The past two week have been VERY hard for me emotionally and spiritually, dealing with adult life.  So for me to sit here and wonder what is wrong with my child, when she has been healed and has been doing great since the night she was healed is just heart breaking for me as a momma.  But so happy God spoke to me tonight and said "April, I healed her.  You need to take a look at your behavior this week and take the blame here." Ouch... 

Tonight she asked me to come pray with her before bed. I did.  She asked that God would let her learn to be nice to others. (sniff, sniff..) I do not think I even thought of such a prayer at 9 years old.  I am so proud of who she is becoming!  I love her so much!  She is going to be a great woman of God!  Both of my girls are!  My most special times when I was a kid was praying with my Momma.. I hold those memories to heart and love it today when I call and there she is to pray with me.  

I never want my girls to feel less than.. and somehow tonight I feel I am pointing fingers to that myself.  So instead of fix my child, it is fix me God!!  Good people come from Good Momma's!! Get your self together, April........

3 John 4:1 I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth. 

 Deuteronomy 4:9-10 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horeb, when he said to me, “Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children.” 

A prayer I found and Love:

  

Most loving Father, the example of parenthood, teach me what to give
and what to withhold. Show me when to reprove and when to praise.
Make me gentle and considerate yet firm and watchful.
Keep me from weak indulgence, or from great severity.
Give me the courage to be disliked sometimes by our children,
when I/we must do necessary things which are displeasing to their eyes.
Give us the imagination to enter into their world
in order to understand and guide them.
Give us all the virtues we need to lead them by word and example
in the path of righteousness. Amen.

Blame Game

Job 1:9-12 Satan replied, Would Job worship you if he got nothing out of it? You have always protected him and his family and everything he owns. You bless everything he does, and you have given him enough cattle to fill the whole country. But now suppose you take away everything he has—he will curse you to your face! All right, the Lord said to Satan, everything he has is in your power, but you must not hurt Job himself. So Satan left.

July of 2011 was the first time I have felt like Job.  I am sure if I knew of the story when I was a teen I would of felt it then too.. I remember sitting in the living room reading this book with sadness, with that get sick cry.  Since then I have pushed this book away.. I didn't want anything to do with it.  Nope, I wanted to be Moses, I was not Job.  I was not going to let my emotions hold me down.. Well, during my studies this man kept showing up.. huhhh leave me alone!!!  So a couple of months ago my FB bible group (Soul Sisters on our SOAP boxes) started it up again.. I thought Ok, I am going to do this!!  As I started to read the sadness hit me within the first verse I had read.. I really was struggling trying to read chapter 6, the get sick cry was back.  My kids thought I was dieing because I am holding my Bible and crying like a baby. I wanted to scream. So guess what I put it down and didn't look at that book in the Bible again.  Until, bam there it was in my study before Church yesterday... But this time it was at the end of the book!! Much more exciting and happy!


Job 42:12 The LORD blessed the last part of Job's life even more than he had blessed the first. Job owned fourteen thousand sheep, six thousand camels, two thousand head of cattle, and one thousand donkeys. He was the father of seven sons and three daughters. 

This week I have been struggling with "Did God allow this to happen to our family?"  "Is it Satan and if so where is God?" Why, Why, Why???? With anger might I add.  I was hurt, God is supposed to be so great, yes there will be test, but DO YOU SEE US?  I was so mad.. So I fumed with the questions of the faithful-less all day.  I DO NOT WANT TO BE A PERSON WITHOUT FAITH AND BELIEF... NEVER... It was like salt on my wounds to hear "In God's time", "Be still", "God is in control", "God is teaching you something", "What are you learning?", Learning? I felt I was falling.. I was giving up.. Going to file bankruptcy and hope someone would lease to own a home for our family.. With all hope stolen from me that night I set on my Momma's front porch alone, God and I had a talk.. I begged for forgiveness for being so angry at Him.  I screamed at Satan, I screamed at the house still on the market, I screamed at God..

This morning as I dropped Kayla off at School she walked all the way to the door then turned to see if I was still there and smiled and waved!  I got tears.. How many times have I been rushed by the line of cars behind me and just went on, the moment she hit the school grass?? How many times has she looked back and I wasn't there to wave that wave and see that smile??  This is how I have felt all week.. Like DO YOU SEE US?  He SEE'S US.. HE FEEL'S US!! But by my distractions and hardened heart I am not letting Him fully feel me..  I do feel His presence.  I try to thank Him for lots of things through out my days.. I am always saying Thank you God for this and that.. But what have I done with this and that? Does He feel the 100% me? The sermon yesterday was about His presence not being about us.. IT IS ABOUT DOES HE FEEL YOUR PRESENCE..  If you don't feel Him than I am sure it is because He don't FEEL you.  I am going to be more alert and not be detracted or hardened so that I am sure HE FEELS ME!  I want to see His wave!

Satan, STAY BEHIND ME AND MY FAMILY....

I have to look at my past as great, just as I do with the things I have overcame.. <---- That is the best blessing God could give me!! I can not live as if today or even 5 minutes ago was awful.  I have to set my anger free, so that I will be free.  I have to ask for forgiveness and live for the RIGHT NOW!! I can not be bitter to my husband and kids because of the things I feel is attacking us.  Is God allowing this stuff to happen to us, good or bad?  I don't really care anymore who is to blame.  But I will not fall.. My name is April and I am about all things new, not old or dead!

It is time, or getting time, for our family to have our fourteen thousand sheep, six thousand camels, two thousand head of cattle, and one thousand donkeys. He was the father of seven sons and three daughters.!!!  I have to have faith and believe!  There is nothing else to do!  Without God we really are nothing.. I have never lost my WANT to worship and praise Him.  I have had my bad emotional days, this past week even my doubts.  But I will not stop praising Him.. I hold that very close!

God is not playing a game, He wants us to find Him with everything in us.  I will tune in for forgiveness and remember that His Grace is enough!  (Graig Groeschel)  I will keep on keeping on! But there is going to be no blame here.. reminds me of the game my girls play and it drives me crazy... I am sure God is feeling a little crazy looking at me too!! :)

My favorite Pinterest Homemade Household Items!!

 Because of Pinterest, I am addicted in trying all these homemade household items.. Here are some I have made and love!! The last two are what I will be making tomorrow! I will let you know what I think after I have used them!! 

SPOT REMOVER: For clothes and carpet!! Also read it is a great shower cleaner. I haven't tried it but will soon!!I found this and tried it for carpet spots and I will never buy spot remover again!! I am on my second batch now! 

1 Cup Dish Washing Liquid, (I used the Gain brand)

2 Cups Hydrogen Peroxide 

I Mixed the two into a empty spray bottle filled the rest with water. The recipe I got this from did not add water, but with me doing this the spots still have came up every time!!

http://www.onegoodthingbyjillee.com/2011/11/goodbye-to-yellow-armpit-stains.html

Homemade Febreze:

I am also on my second batch of this stuff too!! I LOVE IT!!! So much cheaper that the real stuff, but the same effect! 

• 2 cups warm water
• 1/4 cup liquid fabric softener
• 1 tsp. baking soda

 Simply mix these three ingredients together in a spray bottle, shake well!

 http://www.homemademamas.net/2011/07/febrezefor-less.html

Finger Nail Whitener: 

   1 Tbs Peroxide 

      2 Tbs Baking Soda

 Let this paste sit on your nails for 5 minutes! 

 

Homemade Carpet Powder: 

Mix baking soda & several drops of any flavored essential oil together in a bowl using a whisk.  Then, spoon the mixture into a empty Parmesan cheese container, or some other shaker. Sprinkle onto your carpets - let it sit for about 15 minutes, then vacuum up.

 http://www.mrshappyhomemaker.com/2011/07/homemade-carpet-powder.html

  

Powdered Laundry Detergent:

• 1 - 12 oz. box borax
• 1 - 7 oz. box arm & hammer supper washing soda
• 1 - 3 lb. Container of OxyClean
• 2 - 14.1 oz bars of Zote soap
• 1 - 4 lb. box of Arm & Hammer Soda
• 1 - 2 bottles (55 oz.) Purex Chrystal Fabric softener

-Grate soap or break into pieces and process in a food processor until powdered. Mix all ingredients. For light load, use 1 Tablespoon. For heavy or heavily soiled load, use 2 Tablespoons.

*Arm & Hammer "Super Washing Soda". Baking Soda will not work, nor will Arm & Hammer Detergent - It must be sodium carbonate!!

TIPS FOR LAUNDRY SOAP: We use Zote bar soap in the homemade soap recipes, but you can use Ivory, Sunlight, Kirk's Hardwater Castile bars. Don't use heavily perfumed soaps. Washing Soda and Borax can often be found on the laundry or cleaning aisle.

Grout Cleaner:

• 1 Tbl Borax

• 2 Tbl baking soda

• 1 Tbl water 

 Scrub the paste into the tile grout using a toothbrush to remove the dirt.  Wipe clean with water.

  I did a cup at a time, like one cup Borax, 2 cup baking soda and 1 Cup water!!


All-Purpose Cleaner (Kitchen Cleaner):

• 5 oz. Rubbing Alcohol
• 3 oz. white vinegar
• 1 tsp. Laundry Detergent
• 1 tsp White Ammonia
• 2 Drops Essential oil

Fill rest with water 

Homemade Dusting Spray (LOVE):

  

• 2 tsp olive oil
• 1/2 tsp lemon essential oil (or lemon juice)
• 1/4 C. White distilled vinegar (disinfects)
• 1 3/4 C. of water

Shack bottle well! ( I love this stuff, it works so much better than Pledge.) 

Bleach Cleaner (shower):

•  2 oz. of bleach
• 1 tsp. Laundry Detergent

Fill the remaining space with water!

  
Bathroom Counter Cleaner:

•  12 oz. White Vinegar
• 12 oz. of Dawn Dish Soap
• 1 tsp. of Laundry Detergent.

This smells soooo good! Aslo a good shower cleaner!